Bored of the Rings.

 There’s been a bit of a furore lately because, in my opinion, a trade unionist has gone and had a fucking good idea.

 Apparently, Len McCluskey, the Unite leader, has called for a mass strike during the London Olympics, to put the government in it’s place, protest at the general state of the world, etc.

 This suggestion has been branded “appalling”, “unpatriotic”, and “unacceptable” by the government, the Olympic committee, and a lot of other people who don’t do very much for a living.

 I think Olympic striking is a fantastic idea – the idea of public strikes during the Olympics, not of making “Going on Strike” an Olympic event. Although I fancy my chances in the Slogan Shouting, it would ultimately prove very difficult for any of the competitors in the more mobile events to cross the line.

 Anyway, public strikes during the Olympics are a great idea for two reasons (ignoring the obvious one of “not having to go to work.”) Firstly, the look on David Cameron’s smug, look-at-me git face would be worth everything to the working classes. You can occupy London all you want, but it won’t be as uplifting to the proletariat as watching a pile of elitist Tory wankers skulking around in embarrassed silence, or foaming at the mouth with the kind of impotent apoplexy many of us feel on a daily basis because of their policies. They’d look like a bunch of children who’ve just had their sandcastles kicked over. It'd be brilliant.

 Secondly, it would prove to the world that the Olympics aren’t really that interesting anyway. Think about it. Do you watch the Olympics every four years because you care, or because it’s a mildly interesting distraction that happens to be on all fucking day? I’m not averse to watching it, personally, I even enjoy it in an aimless, cup-of-tea-and-a-biscuit way. But does anyone really care? Let’s be honest, most people have one or two sports that they genuinely, passionately care about, and all the rest is just background noise. When it comes to the Olympics, the most popular sport in the world (football) is under-represented, rugby doesn’t even get a foot in the door, and the last time we did well in boxing we ended up with Audley fucking Harrison on our hands.

 What about the more traditional Olympic crowd-drawers, then? The hundred meters? Waste of time. Usain Bolt’s going to win it, everyone knows that. Hurdles? How many currently competing hurdlers can you name? Swimming? That was only must-see TV when the competition included that African fella from a country that had no swimming pools. (I know his name was Eric, but it really should have been “Bob.”)

 Nobody really cares deep down about the Olympics. If you did, you’d be on your computer and think “Ooh, I must just check the latest results in the international parallel bars competitions before I go to bed!” But nobody does that because the Olympics, by and large, serve mostly as a platform for sports that nobody plays or watches for the other 47 ½ months of the cycle.

 Really, that sort of thing is commendable; it's good to give lesser-known sports a chance. But when there’s this much pointless, self-congratulatory fanfare made over the games by a government that’s almost exclusively full of cunts, I think it’s time we got our priorities in order. Fuck ‘em. Let’s strike!